The Bloody Kahwin Thing

Before I proceed, let me just get one thing straight. I have nothing against marriage. Honest. I plan to enter that particular state too someday, have kids, the whole shebang. Just not yet (for a number of reasons). Anyhoo, what ticks me off is when married people try and enforce their particular views on the subject to us Singletons (thank you, B. Jones). Something a friend said today brought back a topic that I was supposed to blog about earlier but for some reason, forgot. I got so angry I nearly killed someone. Luckily, he avoided a messy death from 15 storeys up. Well, here it is.

Scene:
THIRD DAY of symposium.

Location: INT of HOTEL ROOM at CROWN PRINCESS, KL

Dramatis Personae:
OX, CLOSE FRIEND (CL), IRRITANTS (IR) 1 through 5

OX: CL, remind me to iron my shirt for tomorrow, eh?

CL: Sure thing.

IR1: You wouldn't have to do that if you were married, you know. (Other IRs snicker in background).

OX: What's the matter with ironing clothes myself?

IR2: Well, I COULD do that, but then the wife would be out of things to do! (All IRs laugh). Women are like that. What else can they do?

IR21: Yeah, you should get married soon. What are you waiting for? Now's the time, man! You don't know what you're missing. Besides, you can save yourself from sin.

(All IRs laugh)

OX: And I suppose those incest cases were done by single people? Never heard of an unmarried grandpa.

IR3: That's cause the wife's 'no good' anymore. (Gales of laughter).

OX: Well at least if I slept with a hooker tonight I won't be cheating on my wife.

ALL IRs : Wow! You're really wicked!

My dear friends, need I continue? If this in any way represents the mindset of my colleagues in the uni, then count me out, make that double pronto. I can take some ribbing, off-colour jokes and what not with the best of them. Yeah, I even got the grunting laughter down pat. But what gets to me is the sheer...irresponsibility of their remarks. It just hit me that these people stand for everything I despise and loathe in the male sex. The tendency to not look beyond the tip of their own penis (however short) astounds me. And this is not the first time either. It's like a national sport, this blustering about how they don't need to do the laundry, or how the wife never says no. Men like these make me ashamed of my species. And before any of you start labeling me, this has nothing to do with feminism or women's lib. It's about respect. Judging from this and other conversations, they regard their wives as only being slightly higher in station than a pack mule.

So go figure. Right now, practically speaking, I can't imagine myself settling down with a woman that doesn't have at least a tertiary education and a job, or better yet, a career. Want to call me a snob? Check out what IMHO justifies this statement:

1) Living costs are high, and we'll need every penny.
2) I'd like it if I don't need to look outside for mental stimulus, thank you.
3) If anything happened to me (death, crippling disease, etc) she'd be able to take care of herself and the family.

So there. At this moment, God's probably lining up someone who's the total opposite of what I've written down here to steal my heart, but right here and now, this is what I think. To the women reading this, be aware, men are a tricky species. Take time out to read, watch the news on the telly (if you're not working), learn a new skill. Don't let these bastards propagate the illusion that you NEED to do the laundry, that you're MEANT to be subservient. I just pray that I never turn into one of THEM, since a long time ago, someone told me never to forget that:

"It's always somebody else's sister/mother/daughter, until yours gets hurt."

Shit. This is getting to be too long already. Good night, people.