Lost and Found

It's a time of beginnings and endings.

Literally. Coming home from work I booted the PC only to find out all my bookmarks had disappeared from Mozilla. The customary cussing and thrashing of foul language ensued, following which I realised I only had one thing to do:

Re-bookmark every single one of those pages. Kids, please. Back up your bookmarks, at least if you value your hair (and sanity). I know I lost at least some tonight. The upside is my bookmarks folder has never looked cleaner. The downside is that well, things are a bit too clean.

On another front, CSI: Miami finally bowed out on AXN tonight, with a poignant little wrapup. It's not one of the best episodes of the series, not by a long shot, but it's still a fitting end for the series' second season - good enough for me to forsake the pile of paper on my desk, at least for an hour. I guess until CSI: NY comes on in April all that's left for me to do is play catch up with those Miami episodes I've missed and finish up the first two seasons of 24; just enough time for the third season to come on eflix (Link).

That settles my entertainment worries, I think.

In the meantime, a friend said this to me on IM recently:

"I miss being in love, Ash."

As much as I'd like to say that I don't, the fact of the matter is I do, and it's like a niggling little worry at the back of my mind. Now before some of you start saying things like you shouldn't be in love with the idea of being in love, Ash or anything else, let me assure you that I am very much still sane.

It's just that like my friend, there are times when I miss those things people in love feel or do. The anticipation early on, the frantic search for a connection, anything to justify the fact that you feel so things are so right. And then there's the excitement. Oh God, the excitement.

Sadly, I'm far too self aware to let myself do the abovementioned. Love is surrender, I read somewhere once; and right now I don't think I can let myself surrender to anyone. Too many issues, too many complexes, and too many complications have made Ash.ox a very contradictory boy.

So now, if you'll all excuse me, I have some more bookmarks to hunt down.